Keep Going


I want to run, run again away from where I am now but I can't, I want to quit, just have a break and let it all go but I can't! I need to keep going.
I keep going even tough I don't know where I am going, I keep going because I need to stay strong, I keep going because deep inside I know that I have to, I keep going because I have faith in the final outcome and I know that when I get through this situation I will be stronger, better and a changed person, it's one of lifes many tests that we all must face but in a different way, everybody will be faced with pain one day and it is up to yourself how you deal with it


Will you run? or do you stand and face it.

I like to think in the past, remembering the times with You and how life used to be, but it hurts a little because I feel like the best days of my life are already behind me and it hurts even more, because the best days of someones life should be their marriage and the birth of their child/children but I don't know if I will have any of the two anymore, I don't feel like and I don't know if I still want it.
I wanted like 4 children when You were mine but I can't imagine a better mother than You, so why get children with someone else I can't love as much as I love(d) you, no I think the child wish will remain a wish and nothing more than that :(

Maybe you were right what you said about mailing, maybe we will get mad at each other, maybe we will discuss but to be honest, I don't know where we could discuss about but I am not sure about many things anymore, if love is always there when it is declared by someone or your parents and I keep wondering if this feeling will ever go away, so I guess you are right about what you said and that blogging is the best way to keep contact even tough I miss you every night, I really do...


M