The Mummy Adventure. It is actually week 7 of this linky.
So in this link up you have to include 3 photos of 3 things that make you smile. So, here goes:
|Aaron with his cousins, like he's meant to be!|
Anyway, Sunday 29th July she was having a birthday party at HER (new) house, and the hubby asked if he could bring Aaron - I said a firm NO, and said that SHE didn't deserve to see him, and that SHE deserved to hurt (the way I was hurting) - I wanted her to feel his absence.
After saying this, I went to church, and prayed/thought about it.
The first thing the husband said when I got home was, "have you changed your mind?" and he wasn't even shocked when I said "yes".
I asked why he was not shocked, only for him to say "You need a break". So he thought I wanted them to go, so that I could have the day to myself..... (men!)
No, not so: I didn't want Aaron to miss out on a day with his cousins when I KNOW he loves them so so much.
So decided, we both agreed! They (hubby and Aaron) are going.
Anyway I walked them to the door and Aaron said "bye mummy" and as he walked out the door and all I could see was him departing without a backwards glance, I cried. I cried like a baby, at the thought of being left home alone.
My husband put Aaron in the car and I knocked on the window 5 minutes later, to pass him a bag of crisps for Aaron for the car. Hubby wouldn't take them from the window and insisted on coming in.
He said "I'm not having this! Get ready!" to which I said "Why?". He said when he put Aaron in the car, TWICE Aaron said "Mummy crying" and he seemed distressed by it. I said, "how could he?" when "he had his back to me, when he left, there is no way he'd have known I was crying".
My husband just kept repeating that "he is a very intelligent boy".
So the husband said, "we will walk in, and she will allow you to be there or all 3 of us are going home".
Anyway half way there he bottled it, and reminded me that I need to go to Ikea, so he said I will drop you, take Aaron there and come back for you.
I said does that mean I am not going, to which he said no, I will have an hour there with Aaron, leave Aaron there, come back for you and bring you there. I asked if that was so that he could see how the land lies, to which he said yes.
Anyway it was the perfect plan, as I REALLY enjoyed roaming Ikea on my own, and true enough by the time I got there, everyone was in agreement that now was the time to end the fude (how do you spell it?).
So we were both dragged into the kitchen and had to say sorry at the exact same time.
Anyhow, Aaron spent the day playing with his cousins and they looked so so so so happy - I could not have denied him that. And you know what, I had a good day too.
And you know what, it opened my heart and showed me the power and love that forgiveness can bring in to one's life - it was humbling to say the least.
I have edited the photo above as it didn't seem fair to include a photo of them all without their parents' permission, but you can of course see Aaron.
So yes, Sunday did, in every way make me smile. What was also important given the state of my marriage, was the support that the husband gave me. He gave me his backing if we came, and he was also willing to give me his backing if one or neither of us came. He made that very clear. And he did everything in his power to make the day go smoothly.
It doesn't mean I am totally swooning, but he is certainly back in my good books, and suffice to say, we had a beautiful family meal last night.
It may be the beginning of the way forward - maybe!
Anyway, I will do anything for Aaron as the above proves, but what I do know is that I was a very different person after church, Sunday, to the stubborn person I was beforehand. So even though Roman Catholic churches don't exactly have you dancing, clapping and bouncing around, they do still open up your heart in profound ways. At least in this instance!